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Curves Rule? I don’t think so!

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Curves Rule? I don’t think so!

Thanks to the Smutters team for holding the Curves Rule Blog Hop and letting me join in. The point of the Blog Hop is to raise money for Parkinson’s disease. If you’d like to donate the details are at the bottom of the page.

The first thing that I want to tell you is that CURVES DO NOT RULE. Controversial? Perhaps… But let me tell you my story first.

I have always been naturally slim

I have always been naturally slim, at my smallest I was a size 6 and now at my largest I am a size 8. I am a mother of 5 children and I am perfectly healthy. I have no physical or mental illness which impairs my diet and am simply one of those lucky people who was born with a high metabolism.

I am sick and tired of having to defend the shape of my body to other people. I am naturally slim, get over it. I remember my 21st birthday meal. I spent ages getting ready and went out for a lovely meal with my family. I went to the Ladies and came out to absolute carnage! I’d walked past two sneering women who loudly accused me of going to the toilet to throw up. They called me disgusting and pointed out my protruding bones. My family and friends upon hearing this leapt to my defence and I walked out to a full scale argument. The night was ruined. I felt ugly and ashamed.

Alarmingly, a lot of my critics are men and women who have been bullied themselves at some time for the shape of their body. Because I am smaller in size it seems that I should be the one who bears the brunt of their anger? I’ve listened to abuse, been told I need to eat and had arguments with complete strangers who feel that they can say whatever they like to me about my size. Because I am naturally thin people don’t think their comments are insulting but why should I be made to feel as if I am a lesser person because of my size? What gives anyone the right to insult someone because of their size, be it big or small.

Promoting a healthy body image

If you look at social media, you’ll see post after post stating proudly how ‘MEN LIKE CURVES, DOGS LIKE BONES’ Now you tell me if that’s fair? Is that promoting a healthy body image for girls? This particular post received 1,000’s of likes and was shared hundreds of times. Would you like your daughter to see this if she was naturally slim? Like me, she would feel that her body was something to be ashamed of.

Every time you share something which talks about ‘How no one wants to cuddle a bag of bones’ just remember how you felt when somebody said something derogatory about your body. By sharing these comments you are telling someone else that THEIR body is wrong. She might be a 14 year old girl or she could be a 32 year old mother of 5 like me. It’s unacceptable but society tolerates this because it’s okay to insult thin people.

When I started Voluptasse I made it my business to track down plus size lingerie because it is important to me that everyone is given the right to feel happy in their own skin. All women should be able to feel sexy whether they have curves or not, and no one should have those feelings taken from them by another person. If you like your curves, enjoy them! If you are born without them, love the shape you have and don’t let anyone tell you it’s wrong to do so.

So there you go, I don’t believe that ‘Curves Rule’ for one second. I think it’s an insulting term. I believe that healthy bodies and healthy attitudes towards ourselves should rule instead of one size above another. We need to promote acceptance of ALL different body shapes and sizes instead of attacking those who don’t quite meet the expectations of society.

If you like this post please retweet and share it to help raise awareness of damaging attitudes towards other people. In aaddition to raising awareness of Parkinson’s Disease, the ‘Curve’s Rule!’ blog hop has given me an interesting platform to raise my concerns from the other side of the size debate and i’d love to hear your thoughts. Do you agree?

 

Discussion16 Comments

  1. Thank you for this post! I am a skinny girl too (size 6)…I can pull off some “curves” in the right clothing as I have wide hips but compared to some I guess I am pretty curveless. I hate those images too putting down thin ladies…I applaud you for this post 🙂

    • Voluptasse

      Thank you, I hope you raise loads i’ve made my donation. It’s a great cause, my ex- Mother in Law has just been diagnosed and it’s a scary time for her. It’d nice to think this helps someone like her x

  2. Thanks for this. I mostly agree, although I’d amend “It’s unacceptable but society tolerates this because it’s okay to insult thin people” to ‘its unacceptable but society tolerates this because it’s okay to insult people based on body type’ What’s a real shame is seeing fat people lash out at slender people and vice versa because of these attitudes in society instead of banding together to say loudly “Body Shaming IS NOT OKAY”

  3. “I believe that healthy bodies and healthy attitudes towards ourselves should rule instead of one size above another. We need to promote acceptance of ALL different body shapes and sizes instead of attacking those who don’t quite meet the expectations of society.”

    I completely agree with this statement but sadly main stream media representations of women do not and this is not just limited to size either but to age. I am 41, I rarely ‘see’ woman who look like me being portrayed as sexy or sexual, either on TV or anywhere else main stream and for that matter in a great deal of erotic writing too (although that is starting to change) At my age you are meant to be a wife and Mother and be done with all that other nonsense. Just as to be ‘sexy’ you have to be under 25 and a size 6 – 10, depending on your height.

    I think as a general rule for woman who don’t fit into those brackets the visual world we now live in can be very soul destroying, sadly your body type (despite the issues you have had because of it) is, as a general rule viewed as more acceptable than someone who is bigger.

    I think we need to all fight harder to show woman of all different shapes, sizes and ages quite frankly. From beautiful tiny skinny girls right up to large ones and everything in between, creating a more honest view of woman’s bodies today.

    Mollyxxx

  4. I’ve never been skinny a day in my life (at least not in this life), but I can understand the context of your statement. The problem both ‘skinny’ girls and ‘chubby’ girls have is the media. Every woman is made to feel there is something wrong with her. That there’s a norm set by the media, driven by Hollywood, that we all feel we have to adhere to. They’re telling all of us there’s something wrong with who we are, as we are, no matter our size. It’s taken me years to just stop caring what others think of me. I’ve got more important things to worry about in my life than fashion and does my butt look big in this. Yes, it does. So what?! Let’s just sit down and share a cupcake and talk about great books 🙂

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